DRAW A GUN? GET SUSPENDED

In Arizona an eighth grader was suspended for 5 days from his government school. His crime ... drawing a picture of a gun on a piece of paper. No ... we are not kidding you. This is a government school .. you should know by now that this is what government schools do.

The Chandler Unified School District in Arizona actually considered the gun "a threat."

Craig Gilbert is the director of secondary education. He says that there is a range of punishments that administrators can give for "implied threats." Unfortunately, privacy laws prevent the public from accessing information including the drawing itself.

Come on now. Even if we could see the drawing, how "threatening" would it have to be to get suspended for an entire week? Is this really what they had in mind when government educators created the notion of "zero tolerance"?

Wake up folks. These are our 21st century American government schools. They aren't worth a crap (pardon the expression). They exist for one purpose, to provide jobs for government union school teachers and government administrative hacks. Deep in your hearts each and every one of you know that the private sector could be doing a better job, and you're also deeply embarrassed, even if you won't admit it, that you have turned your children over to this hideous system to be, or so you think, "educated."

There is no one entity that is more responsible for the decline of our great country than our system of government education.

BLAME THE PIGEONS

Experts investigating the collapse of the Minnesota bridge have come to an interesting conclusion. Among the stresses on the bridge included ... pigeon poop.

Yep. Years of pigeon poop buildup on the bridge turned into ammonia and acids and eventually into salt. When water combines with salt and ammonia it causes electrical reactions which cause steel to rust. In other words, the bridge corrodes.

Now here is a great use of our taxpayer money. The Colorado Department of Transportation has tried, for so long, to figure out how to remove the pigeon poop, that they are now going to do a two-year research study into how to keep pigeons away from bridges. Your tax money will pay for it, of course. Currently Colorado pays outside environmental specialists to clean pigeon poop off bridges, wearing full biohazard suits and respirators.

I wonder how much of our taxpayer money goes toward killing or warding off pigeons from government structures?

Here's my idea. Yes ... I always have an idea. Give a tax credit of $2.00 to every taxpayer for each dead pigeon they deliver to their nearest IRS or Social Security office. No ... I'm serious. The IRS and the Social Security Administration knows all there is to know about chicken poop .. .so they ought to be able to handle this mess.

THE LATEST IN TERROR THREATS ... CHICKEN FARMS

And speaking of chicken sh___.

According to the Department of Homeland Security, chicken coops could be the next battleground for our war on terror. Who knew?

Homeland Security is proposing regulations of propane gas. They are labeling it a "chemical of interest" and want anyone with 7,500 pounds or more of the propane to register with the agency.

The problem here is that poultry farmers use propane to heat their chicken houses and would be subject to this regulation. An estimated 40,000 farms would have to register.

A few Congressmen (Democrats actually) wrote to Michael Chertoff and asked that the rule be shelved. They said, "Given the serious threats that are currently facing our country and the limited resources of the Department of Homeland Security, please explain why this initiative is a good use of federal dollars."

Imagine that! Democrats concerned about how we are spending out tax dollars? But then ... they, like the IRS and the SSA ... certainly know chickens ... if not for anything else, for their ... oh, never mind.

STAY HOME, GET PAID

In Gaza, Fatah leaders are getting desperate. The EU just decided to continue funding electricity to the Gaza strip, even though Hamas is taking the funds for its own use.

Now in Gaza if you are a government employee you will get paid to do one thing: stay home. As long as you stay home, you will get a salary. This extends to all civil servants except a few healthcare workers, but that might change soon.

Fatah does not want money to fuel Hamas, but it doesn't want to punish pro-Fatah civil servants. So far the effect has been a whole 'lotta nothing, and people complain they are getting bored.

Sounds like they've hired some American government employee union as advisors!

MEXICAN? COME TO WORK IN COLORADO

Colorado wants to be the first state to create a guest worker program for Mexicans. It will allow immigrants to get visas and work in the US legally.

Two lawmakers plan to introduce the bill in January. The program will call for Colorado to open an employment office in Mexico.

As for now, the Colorado Department of Labor and Employment and/or the Colorado Department of Agriculture would work directly with Mexico to expedite applications for worker visas.

One Colorado Senator says, "We're not talking about hiring illegal workers ... We're not talking about making immigrant workers U.S. citizens. We're talking about cutting through the bureaucracy and finding a way for people to work here legally."

Ski instructors, I suppose.

READING ASSIGNMENTS

Now that Democrats can't say that the surge in Iraq is working, their next effort may be to re-define what "victory" even means. They must be feeling lower than whale squeeze these days.

Atlanta may try to ban crack pants. That's the name I use for those saggy pants that are so popular with our urban culture. Do I approve? No. Just cover your todger and everything is fine. If you want to go around looking like a complete idiot that is your privilege. Oh, and ladies, best figure out a way to keep your bra straps in check...if one shows, you get a ticket.

Two-thirds of American adults have little knowledge of world politics, and more than half of adults said that they just don't care or like learning about other countries. Government education again.

Atlanta Falcons fans are unloading their tickets. Thanks, Michael Vick. What a great thing you've done for your teammates and Arthur Blank.

A fellow thug (NBA player) defended Michael Vick, calling dogfighting a sport. I'll bet you this characters has tattoos on his neck.

The Georgia legislature has declared warmers (as I like to call them) to be "alarmists" using flawed statistics to predict the catastrophic future of "climate change." Yahoo! We finally got something right in Georgia!

A study by the Ewing Marion Kauffman Foundation says that our inept immigration system may lead to a "reverse brain-drain." Scientists, engineers and other professionals from India, Taiwan, Japan, China and Britain may have to return home after waiting for years for proper visas. Yeah ... but we'll keep the pine straw spreaders here for now.

The Taliban attacked a NATO base in Afghanistan. NATO's response? "This is another example of the Taliban extremists ignoring international law of armed conflict." That's it? Damn, I'll bet those Taliban Islamist thugs are quaking in their caves right about now.

John Stossel explains that despite America's WHO ranking, we still have the best healthcare. Yeah ... for now. Wait until Hillary gets her Oval Office.

Tony Blankley puts an end to the ideas that Obama will bring real change to this country and Hillary will bring a lot of experience.

The other day we were talking about whether or not you would vote for Mitt Romney considering he is a Mormon. A recent Rasmussen poll shows that more people would vote against Romney than vote against Hillary.

54 illegal immigrants managed to fit into a motor home attempting to cross the border.

A predictable liberal aaaactivist says that "FoxNews wants war with Iran." Whatever.

One of the Barbie Bandits pleaded guilty because she "wanted to take responsibility for her actions."

Apparently if you look like a cavemen, women think you are more attractive!

Spaniards are up in arms because their socialist government pulled all live broadcasts of bullfights.

This man is 90-years-old ... and he is still fathering children?

BOORTZ BLAST NEWSLETTER
Everyone is talking about the Boortz Blast newsletter. Do you want yours? Sign up here and we'll deliver it directly to your inbox every 2 weeks. If you signed up but aren't receiving it, either your

company or your spam filter could be keeping it from you. Try using a personal email address and check your spam filter's junk folder for wayward newsletters.

COMMUNITY
If you like Neal and are looking for like minded people to hang out with online or off, check out these places:

Talkmaster Yahoo Group

Belinda Skelton, Cristina Gonzalez and Laura Nunemaker assist in the daily preparation of Nealz Nuze!