BOOK SIGNING TONIGHT!

Virginia Beach, Virginia (naturally) at the Barnes & Noble

4485 Virginia Beach Blvd! 7:00 p.m.

GONZALES HEADS FOR THE DOOR

But ... I do have a question for the media. The reason for firing these U.S. attorneys seems to be that they were reticent in pursuing criminal investigations and prosecutions of Democrats for voter fraud. It seems to me that somewhere along the line the media would be somewhat interested in those allegations of fraud at the polling place. Ahhhh ... but then it's Democrat voter fraud we're talking about, isn't it?

Never mind.

One more thing. Do you know who is running the investigation in the House? California Democrat Linda Sanchez is the chairman of the House subcommittee looking into the matter. Her sister, Loretta, was elected with the help of massive Democrat voter fraud in Orange County, California.

Ironic, don't you think?

NOT BACKING DOWN

Yesterday on the air I told yet another story of parents pushing their (I'm sure) adorable little children on complete strangers in public places. This one happened at a restaurant in Naples, Florida before my book signing last Friday night. I was alone and didn't want to occupy a table ... so I decided to sit at the bar for a quick chicken salad. Now as I understand it, it is verboten in Florida for children under the age of 21 to sit at a full-service bar. Whether it's illegal or not, the bar is for adults, dammit, and not a "cool" place for your children to sit while they pretend to drink. So there I was -- minding my own business (for a change) when in comes a family with two or three pre-teen kids. I would say they were around seven to ten years old. The plop themselves right there at the bar taking up about five seats. The kids immediately order their Shirley Temples and Roy Rogers and the fun begins. I just moved to the end of the bar, ate my salad and left ... just a wee bit upset.

When I told the story on the air some woman called to tell me that I was beginning to sound like a crotchety old fart. OK ... I've had a chance to think about that ... and lady, you're wrong. I'll tell you what I'm sounding like. I'm sounding like an adult who is sick and damned tired of misbehaving children in public. I'm sounding like an adult who, if he wants to hear screeching kids in a restaurant, will go to Ryan's or McDonalds. I'm sounding like an adult who earnestly wishes that parents would spend a bit less time reminding all of us how perfectly adorable their children are, and would spend a bit more time working for compliments on how well-behaved they are. I'm sounding like an adult who is going to buy ankle-chains for the next brat that eats up about 1000 of my frequent flier miles kicking the back of my seat ... and I'm sounding like an adult who wants to nominate that AirTran crew that kicked the family off that Ft. Myers to Boston flight because they refused to bring their hellion under control for the Nobel Peace Prize.

It wasn't me who came up with that "Children should be seen and not heard" line. That gem was penned long before I came on the scene, and it is just as true today as it was ten.

Just a few hints for some, though assuredly not all, of you parents out there. First, you do not have the cutest child in the world. Don't believe everything you hear. Your child can be as ugly as a bucket of sea slugs and people will still tell you how cute they are. And if people will lie to you about how your spawn looks, they will lie to you about how they act ... or not say anything at all. If you child is emitting that high-pitched shriek in public there is somebody nearby that is being bothered by it. Do something! If you child is kicking the seat in front of him, the person in that seat is irritated. Do something! If your child is running out of control around a restaurant, there is someone nearby who wants to either trip her or pour salad dressing on her head on her next pass. Do something! And if you child is sitting at a full-service bar, at least buy him a real drink.

THE LATEST 9/11 THEORY

Democratic spokeswoman Rosie O'Donnell has posted a new theory on her blog about 9/11. That theory would be that the twin towers were brought down on purpose by the government to...are you ready for this? To get rid of records of government investigations into corporate fraud. The Blob actually posted that on her blog.

And you thought Howard Dean was nuts...this one takes the cake.

Her theory reads like an e-mail chain letter...the fires in the World Trade Center tower weren't evenly distributed. Firefighters warned the building was going to blow up. The building collapsed perfectly! It was an obvious demolition with Chaney observed running from the scene with a case of dynamite! So what exactly was the motivation behind blowing up the World Trade Center on purpose?

To destroy government records, of course. In particular, records involving corporate investigations of McEnroe. So evidently Mohammed Atta and his band of hijackers flew the planes into the towers just for show. The real action was the buildings being blown up.

How long does Baba Wawa keep this moonbat on her television show?

DEMOCRATS LOADING UP ON PORK

Democrats, who supposedly oppose the war in Iraq with such vigor, are having absolutely no problem loading up an emergency funding bill with their pet pork projects. How much is being thrown down the proverbial pork barrel? Try $10 billion dollars. That's right...billion...with a 'B.' Let's look at just a few of the examples, shall we?

Among the war spending: $3.7 billion in farm subsidies. How this benefits our fighting men and women in Iraq, who knows. Another $2.9 billion is thrown in for good measure, this time for Gulf Coast rebuilding...you know, Katrina and all. Topping off the list is $2.4 billion for things like money for school districts, health insurance for the poor and such. But what's even more comical is that Democrats are defending it.

They say the money is needed and can't wait for the new fiscal year. This is just amazing...here you have all these Democrats opposed to the war, who say it's wrong, who want it to end...but they have no problem larding up the spending bill that will be used to fund the war they so despise. Hypocrisy doesn't even begin to describe this charade.

Oh, and don't forget the $1 billion for bird flu vaccines...and $500 million for wildfire suppression...sounds like war spending to me!

DON'T PAY ANY ATTENTION TO THIS REPORT

There's a report by a panel of experts out in Great Britain (you can read it here) which says that alcohol and tobacco cause more harm than marijuana ... and that any attempt by the government at total prohibition is "bound to fail." This report will be part of a complete review of British drug laws in 2008. It's interesting to note that the report says that U.S. drug laws are more unscientific and irrational than Britain's. No surprise there. Remember, in some states you can't even own a sex toy. Think about it ... we are arresting about 800,000 Americans every year for use or possession of a drug that is safer than alcohol or tobacco.

No .. I don't smoke marijuana; and I wouldn't smoke it if it were legal. I'm just not fond of absurd laws.

AND DON'T PAY ANY ATTENTION TO THIS REPORT EITHER

This one is for your environmentalists out there ... you Prius drivers. You know who you are. When you drive a Prius you're so much better than everyone else on the road, right? Yeah .. right. Because your carbon footprint is so much smaller than everyone else's. You're special. You care about the environment while that jerk driving the Hummer doesn't.

Uh oh. Maybe things aren't as they seem.

There's a story in The Recorder from Central Connecticut University which says that it takes more energy to produce a Prius than it does a Hummer. I'm not going to try to explain it to you here ... just read the story.

Oh ... and all of this is caused, of course, by global warming.

REDNECK SCRAP BOOK

I think we may have found the perfect redneck food. More in the Redneck Scrap Book.

READING ASSIGNMENTS

Herman Cain says he's often asked about the chances of the candidates running for president. People tend to object to one candidate or another because of their political baggage. So Cain analyzes each candidates' baggage and what it means.

Russia and Iran are continuing their spat over money, with Russia now giving Iran an ultimatum. Russia is going to withhold promised nuclear fuel for its power plant unless Iran suspends its uranium enrichment. That's one big country finally on board with reigning in Ahmadinejad.

Another former official of Saddam Hussein's regime has hanged. This time it was Saddam's vice president who was marched to the gallows for the 1982 killings of 148 people. He's the fourth man to swing from the rope for that event...and is now enjoying his desert sand nap.

It's the fourth anniversary of the U.S. invasion of Iraq, but rather than marking it as some sort of disaster, Cal Thomas views it as a positive event. He says it's time to congratulate Iraq on its independence. Good point.

Thomas Sowell has long been a fan of talk shows and says he listens to the Godfather and a few others. He points out that on shows these days, all of the guests have predetermined positions...and they never change. Which makes for boring TV.

Byron York analyzes Valerie Plame's testimony before the House on Friday, and says it differs considerably from what the Senate discovered in their investigation. Inconsistencies abound and York chronicles just some of them.

Four years into the war in Iraq, Christopher Hitchens says there are indeed hard questions to be asked and answered about the invasion. Hitchens goes back to the very beginning of the war..back to the United Nations in 2002 to find some answers.

David Limbaugh calls out Republicans who are MIA when it comes to firing back at Democrats over one invented scandal after another. The latest example is the firing of the 8 U.S. Attorneys. Republicans are once again just rolling right over...giving in to the Left.

Frank Gaffney says John McCain deserves credit for one thing: his steadfast support for the war in Iraq. Gaffney talks about John F. Kennedy's "profiles in courage" book and wonders what the late president would think about everything going on right now.

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