Wow!  What a wonderful sense of humor you have?  Me?  Watch Obama deliver another State of the Union Speech?  Sorry … but I think the way the saying goes is “No way in hell.”  I’m enjoying life too much in retirement to destroy my mood and be reminded of what horrible trouble my country is in by watching this man spread his lies, his class warfare, and his anti-American agenda to his sycophants tonight.

 Now I will be interested in what Florida Senator Marco Rubio will have to say in response to 0bama’s speech tonight .. and I might tune in to catch that.  In the meantime, I have thought of some things that I might do to pass the time while 0bama is presenting his far left agenda to the moochers, leaches and parasites that fawn over him so. 

 Here are some ideas:

•  I understand the Westminster Dog Show is on the tube tonight.  I love dogs … usually more than I do people.  And when it comes to 0bama, pretty much any mongrel would be preferable.  Another advantage with dogs?  You can be pretty sure they won’t crap on our Constitution.

• Since it will be dark when 0bama speaks (ohhhhhh!  Could that be raaaaaacist?) that would be the time when most “gun violence” occurs.  So maybe I’ll take my Uselton 1911 .45 and, load a full magazine, and set it on the doormat outside the front door.  I’ll then go inside and peek through the blinds.  When I see my gun head off to wreak havoc in the neighborhood I’ll follow at a distance to document just how dangerous this gun is.  After all … 0bama will be blaming the violence on the guns tonight, not the thugs and predators who use them.

• There’s a wet spot on the ground outside the BoortzBus this morning.  Perhaps I’ll go fill it in with some dirt.  Then I’ll start a timer to see just how long it takes the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers to come by to tell me that I have violated the Clean Water Act because that wet spot is actually a part of a navigable waterway of the United States.  Then I guess I’ll have to go hire a lawyer.

• The loggerhead sea turtles aren’t laying eggs right now, so I guess going to the beach to get something for breakfast tomorrow morning is out of the question.

• I found this neat new app for my iPhone.  It’s a metronome for fine-tuning your golf swing.  Tick – Tick – Tick – Beeeeeep – Beep – Beeeep.  In the hour it takes 0bama to set forth his destructive agenda I could have that swing nailed.

• If I really wanted to feel depressed I could sit back and imagine the sense of hope for a positive economic recovery and a return to economic liberty that would fill the air if Mitt Romney were delivering this speech tonight instead of Dear Leader.

• I could go to a grocery store, wait until you see someone buy better food than you can afford with food stamps, then follow them out of the store to see what kind of car they drive.  Tell them it’s a nice car and ask them what the payments are.  Then imagine what kind of food they could afford if they weren’t spending so much money on a car they can’t afford.

• I could check the WhiteHouse.gov website to see if they have responded to my White House petition yet.  I wonder if I get a personal email, or are they just going to post their “thanks, but no thanks” response on the website?

• Or I could just take a quick one-hour nap and dream of a nation of self-reliant and responsible Americans who do not believe that the problems that arise from their bad decisions constitute a lien on the success and lives of those who have lived more responsibly.

• I could go house-hunting for Phil Mickelson in Naples, but thus far he hasn’t asked me for any help.  I do have a good golf club I could recommend however.

• One more thing … I’m only halfway through “The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich.”  The sad truth is I would learn more about 0bama and how he operates by continuing that read than by watching him on the tube tonight.

So many choices!  Every one of them better than listening to 0bama deliver another speech.